Holiday

    "Olivier, I really, really like you"
I wanted to say this. He wanted to stuff a lot of the shower curtain into my mouth. He wanted to do this without detaching it from the plastic tracking thing that held it in place. He said:
    "Don't bite it"
 He was feeding it in sort of carefully so that it didn't snag on my teeth, or something. "Stuff" was totally the wrong word. I was trying to say something nice, but he glowered anyway. The act of trying to speak, in itself, sabotaged the intricate business of making me eat the shower curtain, whilst keeping it relatively pristine and in position. It didn't matter what it was I was trying to say.